Monday, August 31, 2020

There goes away, a piece of my heart from (ho)me!

Day-1 with my "heart" in my hands, Urbana, IL, USA 


"Bhuvan?"
"Yeah"
"Can you come down for a sec? It's opinion time and I need your opinion."
"Ok"
"How is it?"
"It's good."
"Just good?"
"Very good!"

Last few years, I have been seeking Bhuvan's opinion on every single painting I worked on. Oftentimes he either says 'good' or 'very-good'. Sometimes, he even identifies areas of improvements. He has been my first critic, the very first person to see most of my completed Art works.

Bhuvan has never been away from me for more than a couple of weeks. It happened only once when he went to India on vacation with his mom and brother Rithvik. That was almost 10 years ago when he was little. I was asking him the other day if he ever was away from me for few days except his trip to India that I could not join. He reminded me his one-week school-trip to Washington D.C. in his 9th grade. Of course, that was another instance.

Bhuvan is a grown-up kid now, and goes all the way to Univ. of Michigan, Ann Arbor, MI, far away from (ho)me for his undergrad. I suddenly feel void in my life. I really don’t know how I lived before Bhuvan came into my life with a smile. When he smiled every single time I took him into my hands, on day-one in the hospital, I felt like my Dad came back into my life. His very first daycare caretaker “Susan” always used to say to me, “He is so cute, I don’t want him to grow up.”. I said the same to myself many times, year after year, every single year as he was growing up.

Time flies faster than we think, it flew-by very fast with Bhuvan in my life. It's only like yesterday that I was driving him to Kumon classes, RSM classes, FLL Robotics, Sunday classes at MIT, Soccer games, Basketball games, Ultimate Frisbee games, Tennis plays, daily Karate classes for 7 years until he got his black-belt, Swimming classes, Swimming meets, Piano classes, Violin classes, Sunday Prajna classes, Art classes, numerous birthday parties, Sleepovers, Hindu temples, cultural events and competitions he participated, events we attended, every family-trip we made in the past 17 years, and the list goes on. My evenings and weekends, last 17 years were mostly filled with him and his classes.

Now, suddenly new questions: "How am I going to live?" and "What am I going to do?" pop up in my mind, making me go blank. I was always hoping he would go to a college close to where we live, definitely not hundreds and hundreds of miles away. On one side I feel happy that Bhuvan chose one of the finest universities in the country and in the world. On the other half, I go unhappy as I miss him already. I knew this day arrives one day, but it arrived faster than I thought it would. It's been only two days since we dropped him off at his college. I am missing my heart already.

Whenever I say, "Bhuvan, you are my best friend.", he just nods his head. A follow-up saying, "Bhuvan, I am your best friend.", he simply smiles. That smile Bhuvan gives me is the same smile he gave me on day-one when he arrived in my life. The same smile that keeps me alive even when he stays away from (ho)me.

"Bhuvan, I left a piece of my heart in your college campus."
"I will collect it when you bring it back home with you once you finish your college."
"I am always your best friend."
"Give me that smile again..."
"Miss you!"
"Love you!"

- Your Best Friend
       ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
“Children make you want to start life over.” ~ Muhammad Ali

Bhuvan at his best, any sport he plays

His dream starts @ UMich, Michigan, USA

With my best friend in my life...@ UMich, Aug 29, 2020

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